Truth

Ok I just need to say this to someone (and yes I know this is a blog and I am really talking to no one) but if I had my choice (which I don't and really,I wasn't ask if I want to),i would not go to the oncologist tomorrow. I would just go to work and pretend that I am just ok but yet that is not the reality. I want to stay in this period of time after surgery but before the treatment start. The quiet moments where no dr are poking and giving me % and where I believe I am cancer free. Yet tomorrow must come. Truth I like to think sometimes that this is all a dream that I will wake up from and than God it was only a dream :)